Heart's Longing

Today I read a note by someone I know. They were writing in their blog about the fact that in a month their son would be moving out to go to university. With a great deal of heart and truth this dad wrote about how this was right, good and fitting for his son to go - but that it hurt. There was a separation - a changing of the relationship that he knew was permanent.

I have to say that I can't imagine that. I mean, I really can't imagine my kids leaving my house in any permanent way. Don't get me wrong - I know it's going to happen. In fact, my wife and I have often talked about the fact that our job is to raise kids that are wise, independent, able to fend for themselves and who have seen (and hopefully have also chosen) a life that is spiritually connected to Jesus Christ.

Maybe, in the wisdom of God, these "separations" happen gradually. On Sunday my son will be going to camp for the very first time. He is only 8. And, to be honest, my heart sort of aches a bit at the prospect of him being gone for 6 days. It's not because the camp is questionable. It's not because I don't think he is ready. In fact, the camp looks great - wake boarding, waterskiing, archery, swimming - everything! And, he is going with a kid his age from church to a camp that has it's sights set on growing his heart for Jesus. What more could a parent ask for?

So, I am excited for him and all that next week holds for him. I will be praying that he is safe, that he has tonnes of fun - and that the faith he has in Jesus grows. Somehow, however, - I suspect that I am going to have to grow as well. Maybe it's a growing in faith and trust that God has my kids well in hand.

Hmmm, seems like change makes us grow in ways that we never would have on our own.

Perceptions

If I asked you what your neighbour is like, what would you say? What about the guy down the hall at work? The person you see every day at the gym? Your pastor? The clerk you see at the store?

A few years ago Malcolm Gladwell wrote a book entitled, "Blink" in which he argued that most of us will make as effective of decisions in the immediate as we would if we were given a longer period of time to consider the options. His point? Over the course of time most of us become highly adept at reading situations, sizing things up, coming to accurate conclusions and processing data.

I think I have been learning that this is less true when it comes to people. One of the great gifts that God gives us is the input, advice and wisdom of other people. 

In fact, one wise writer says 

"He who answers before listening--that is his folly and his shame." 

(Proverbs 18:13). 

Another wise man once wrote, 

"If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise." 

(Proverbs 15: 31). 

Still another quote reads this way, 

"To one who listens, valid criticismis like a gold earring or other gold jewelry." 

(Proverbs 25: 12)

Clearly, wisdom is on the side of listening long before speaking. Today I (re)learned and was reminded of the need to listen long to people - not just for their words, but for their heart. My folly is to jump in too quickly, debate too soon, tweak ideas and words too eagerly. 

Call me slow to lear certain lessons if you want, but I am treasuring the value of listening to the heart of others before speaking. It makes things like figuring out truth, standing side by side and seeing the problem for what it really is a lot easier in the long run.

Jesus

I know - a blog entry about Jesus. It seems to much like Sunday school. Can't I come up with anything more compelling. The short answer - nope. I will add my comments in a minute, but for just a minute listen in to a fantastic clip from N.T. Wright about Jesus. Here's the link:

http://www.theworkofthepeople.com/index.php?ct=store.details&pid=V00934

A few weeks ago I went to take some courses at Acadia University. The first course was all about Jesus - and the most popular and challenging views of Jesus. Beyond the CS Lewis lord, liar, and lunatic options there are any number of opinions including notions that Jesus was an Aryan, (I know - that one took some work to appreciate), that he wasn't Jewish, wasn't divine, was a "cynic" in the classic/ cultural sense of the word, that he was disinterested in Scripture and was more of a rogue, that he didn't exist at all, that he was more like a magician than a saviour or teacher etc.

For a week we pored over the evidence, looked at the writings of historians - both secular and religious of Jesus' time - examined the manuscript evidence, poked around in archeological findings including Dead Sea Scrolls and Oxyrhynchus,  looked at extra biblical material - and read the accounts of the gospels themselves.

On one level the scientific and theological part of me was very compelled by the evidence, the data and the sheer volume of material that one has to consider is staggering and overwhelming in its import and impact. In fact, I could write a month's worth of blog entries about just these sorts of matters and in much more detail.  But more than that, can I simply say that apart from any religious convictions or heart matters - my esteem, regard, respect and honour for the teacher, person, leader and man that Jesus was and is - sharply up and to the right! I mean, even if you have issues and questions - a sheer investigation of what he said, how he acted, what it all meant in its original context - it makes him arguably the most compelling figure in human history.

Allow me to also add that in addition to my esteem going up - my heart simply grew in love for Jesus. It is simply impossible for someone to take serious what he said, did, taught and accomplished - and not be moved in some way. And by take it seriously I mean what Wright meant - read the stories, hear his words, imagine yourself there with him, understand the audacity, the courage, the humour and the power of Jesus' words and actions in their context - bet you can't do it and remain the same.

Go ahead, I dare you!

It's Been a While

Hey there reader,

I know - its been a while since I have written. I am making my way back - and hope to put up a few posts on some things that have been rattling around in my mind the past while.

In the meantime, take the time to look at this fantastic clip form Dallas Willard. He is, conceivably one of my most favourite authors/ thinkers of all time.

Check it out - and drop a note to let me know what you think.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iwXFP1U7f5U&feature=player_embedded&hd=1

Lord of the Sandwich

Check out that sandwich! Seriously  - it's a heart attack one a plate.

A week or so ago I went to a restaurant in Hamilton with my dad. He lives near London so we decided to meet half way and grab lunch. We picked a place that I had heard through the grapevine makes some good BBQ. Wow, were the rumours right!

We walked in and I noted that there were only men in the room. (Later, a woman did come in. The owner  walked over to her and in a really gruff voice asked this diminutive Asian woman, "Whaddya want?" - thereby causing her to scurry out of the place without saying a word!)

After we sat down I looked over the menu and was delighted to see that really, there was only meat on the menu. Sure - there were sides with baked beans, etc., - but BBQ protein was clearly the star of the show. Being new to the place I ordered a pulled meat sandwich. I figured I was playing it safe. I should have wondered when the owner/ server chuckled a bit at my order and said, "Are you sure?"

Anyway, after waiting a few minutes the aforementioned sandwich pictured above was placed in front of me. And, in case you were wondering, it is being served on a full sized lunch tray. No plate. That's a TRAY under it.

I will spare you the tales of meat sweats and all the other bodily functions that accompanying far too much meat consumption, (however, rest assured, the 1/4 of the sandwich I did eat at lunch was fantastic!) to make a simple point.

My dad and I got there a bit late for lunch, so, about 20 minutes after we got there we were the only ones in the place. That being the case, we chatted with the owner asking him the obvious question: what's with the obscenely large portions? He explained that when he opened (10 months ago) he shopped around for advertising only to discover that it was going to be about $3000/ month. So, he figured that rather than give that money to a newspaper, he would spend $1500 more a month of meat, give HUGE portions, and let people do the talking for him. In short, he said that he wanted to be known for his generosity as opposed to his advertising.

Some of the interesting parts of this are obvious. Steering clear of the whole topic of the moral implications of overeating, over-portioning animal bi-products, etc. (those are both whole other topics - worthy of their own conversation) - I was struck with two things.

Faced with a choice of looking slick (ie advertising) or being a certain way (in this case "generous"), this man's choice was to actually be known for being a certain way. This struck a bit of a nerve for me as a belched my way back to Oakville. Fact is, most of the time I would rather that people have a certain impression of me  - more so than I really want to be that thing. So, for example, if I am honest I think I would have to admit would like to "advertise" in some way that I am generous and hope people come by and find me in some generous moment more so than I really want to actually BE generous. I like the reputation more than I do the virtue.

So, clearly there is a means to an end for a BBQ restaurant - they want to be known for great BBQ so they give huge portions hoping people will come, they make more $, etc. But, what about for me? Well, I think what I learned is that I actually might need to desire the virtue and goodness of Christ as much - if not more - as I want others to see those in me. Does that make any sense?

As another simple observation I would just add

I wonder:  If a whole bunch of people decided to long for, ask for, pray for and discipline themselves towards looking and sounding a lot more like Jesus Christ  - would we need web pages, advertisements at Easter and Christmas, etc., entice people to come and hear about Jesus? Or, could it be that if we plowed all our efforts simply into being like our Rabbi Jesus, that people would simply want to check him out for themselves - and we wouldn't have to get in the way?

Those are just some random thoughts. But, having fully recovered from my first visit I am trying to figure out how I can back for a "bit" more BBQ . . .

Made for more . . .

Turns out, I have an infinite capacity to be a dink! No, no - it's true. Really it is. 

Seriously, have you ever watched yourself do life - only to be really disappointed with how much of a dink you can really be? I mean, you know you should be better. You know you can be better. You even observe yourself in the moment knowing full well that the next words or actions that are going to come from you are, in fact, ridiculous and stupid. And yet, you persist. You speak. You act. And then, you regret it (and feel compelled to blog about it)

Yep, that was my day, - or at least part of it. I was in a conversation today with an old friend and colleague today over lunch. Sadly, I was argumentative, judgmental and more than a bit off-putting - and all of that was before we had even ordered our meal!

Why? I mean, I know that there have been some really great things that I have learned from God in the past few years. I have learned that it's way better to encourage others than recklessly criticize. I have learned that it is really better to applaud efforts that others are making - as opposed to make being critical of them simply out of sport. And yet, in both cases I dropped the ball, lapsing into a discouraging diatribe of oppositional thinking and conversation - all the while being sure to thinly veil it in ways that make me appear smarter than I really am, thereby affording me at least the appearance of being smart. And, all the while I was simply being a dink.

Part of the reason for writing about this is because I think that this might happen to more than just me. If not - that's fine too. I simply think that I needed to acknowledge it - and deal with how disappointing we can be to our own selves. Sometimes I am frustrated at how easily I slip into patterns of conversation and thought that I really had convinced myself were a part of my past - that God had actually healed me of some of these things. And then, I go and prove that I am still not as far down the road of sanctification and good leadership that I thought I was. 

More than the disappointment, however, I think I also realized something else. In these moments - and hundreds of others that happen to all of us every day - we have the chance to treat others in (at least) one of two ways: a) as the person they have been in our lives in the past; or, b) as the person God imagines/ longs for and is making them to be. 

I find it soooooo easy to treat people as they have been in my life. When I do this I intuitively chart out the sum total of my interactions with them in the past, assigning a series of check and minuses based on what they have said, done, etc., in relationship to myself. The end result is that all of this history serves a a predeterminer of the script  and dialogue that I will have with them in the future. Sometimes the script has been great in the past - and lunch goes well. Other times, not so much.

Last week someone challenged me to think/ act differently with people. What I mean is this: I was challenged to treat everyone I meet/ talk to/ live with/ go to church with/ work with/ am neighbours with/ etc., etc., (you get the picture) as the person God would have them be as a new creation in Christ Jesus. This means that I refuse to treat them as the sum of my interactions with them - but honour them as people in the imagine of God. It means that rather than acting out of pride, hard heartedness, born out of my past interactions with them, that I would treat others with a humility that sees God's work in them and cooperates with it; with a encouraging spirit that tries to fuel the work of God in them; and with a Kingdom vision that understands that both of us are people for whom God has great plans. 

So, swing and a miss on a number of accounts today at lunch. 

However, there are dozens of people on my horizon in the rest of this week that will give me a chance to try again. My prayer this week? That God will show me how I can - in each conversation and interaction - cooperate with what God is trying to do in the lives of people with whom I interact.  

I know - it sounds simple. But, the truth is I am sick and tired of being a dink. . . . 

Pretty

I read a blog or two. Not many - but a few. And, often - like this blog - they are interesting meanderings and people that I know, trust, am curious about, etc. One blog that I take a look at pretty regularly is from my friend Phil.

In addition to being a grand friend - Phil is thoughtful, expresses himself with beauty and often provokes thought about topics that you and I might "feel" but aren't able to put into really clear words.

Well, Phil did it again the other day. Since both he and I are the fathers to young girls, I know that resonated with a post he made recently. I originally thought that I would try to re-capture it in my own words. But, truthfully, I can't do much better than he did. So, below is a link to Phil's blog. I heartily recommend it as a place worth reading. In particular, the link that I am giving is to the recent post he made about raising our children.

I also found the video link on this particular post to be pretty effective and worthwhile. However, like Phil, I would add that anyone with an aversion to the F-Bomb might want to avoid it. That said, I would add that given the reality that is being described, the vulgarity might actually be pretty fitting.

Here's the link to Phil's blog.

http://squinch.net/2011/03/07/a-pretty-dangerous-place/

Tweeting Truth?

Know who they guy in the picture is? His name is Rob Bell. He is a poet, artist, teacher and pastor who happens to work at a church called Mars Hill. It's in Michigan. If you listen to Rob via podcasts or video, or, for some reason end up @ Mars Hill on a Sunday he is preaching you will appreciate that he is a very gifted communicator with some provocative thoughts about God and life with Him. 

In a few weeks Rob will release a book entitled, "Love Wins." 

You can read the write up to the book here 

(http://www.amazon.ca/Love-Wins-About-Heaven-Person/dp/006204964X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1299535597&sr=8-1) 

You can watch the promo video for it here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ODUvw2McL8g&hd=1

Now, I am not making any claims about Rob Bell, what he thinks, believes or is asserting in this book. In part because I think that would be foolish, since the book isn't out yet. I will admit that he asks provocative questions and clearly the book and video are designed to get people thinking - and, the cynic in me says, to sell lots and lots of books!

Anyway, here's the reason for this post: a few weeks ago a bunch of other church leaders (Justin Taylor and John Piper) watched the video and read the release re: the book. Their claim? Rob Bell is a - wait for it - he's a ghastly universalist!!!!! That's right, their CLAIM is that Rob Bell thinks everyone goes to heaven! 

I say claim, because, neither have actually read the book. They are inferring it. And, in so doing, John Piper tweeted, "Farewell Rob Bell" as if to say that we ought to bid adieu those in our midst who espouse anything short of what we think represents orthodoxy.

Again, let me be clear: I don't know what Rob Bell beleives about this sort of thing. I have neither asked him, nor read the book. But, here's what I find really, really hard to understand: if I did believe that someone (of influence or not) was spousing something that I found hard to stomach, understand or swallow, why oh why would i bid them farewell? Why wouldn't I, especially in this case, want to go to their place, grab a coffee and say, "tell me about what you are thinking on this topic cuz we see it so differently and I might have something to learn!"

What is it about Christian leaders that makes them feel like we ought to always distance, shun or shame the people with whom we disagree? 

Why wouldn't we, in the pursuit of truth, always and by default want to talk to everyone with whom we disagree, listen intently to how they see things, engage in the dialogue of ideas and pursue truth?

I know - some of you are going to say that's a bit naive and I should put down my rose coloured glasses. Others are going to feel - but never say - that this is a very fearful place to live - because others with whom we disagree might influence our thoughts and if they do, our whole house of cards might come crashing down!

Again, call me idealistic, but I genuinely believe God to be a God of truth. That means that he is the Lord of ALL truth, no matter where it is found. So, could Rob Bell teach me something? I hope so. Could Piper and others - again, I hope so! However, if we Christians keep parceling up the world along the lines of who thinks the same as us @ every turn we will sacrifice any hope of being friendly and kind, let alone having even a distant shot at being things like salt and light. 

Listening Ears

In the biblical book of Proverbs the writer makes the following statement,


"To answer before listening— that is folly and shame." - Proverbs 18:13

Today I saw my own folly and shame. Why? Because I made assertions and statements before listening. Maybe you know what this feels like. You spout off about something or someone - only to discover that if you had listened just a bit longer to what was really going on, you would never have said what you said. Or, you think things in the quietness of your own heart, letting these thoughts or ideas run wild inside yourself until the come to rest in  a place of conviction - only to discover that if you had listened a bit longer  you would never have come to the conclusions that you did. 

I did that - and this morning I felt a bit of the folly and shame that comes with not listening. 

The person I was listening to had a lot of passion, perhaps even more conviction. This person knew what they wanted, had a deep sense of what they were made to do in this world. And, had I asked about this first, and then listened - well, I bet I wouldn't have felt the folly of speaking first and listening later. 

So, at the end of the day I am a person - with a lot of my own junk, opinions, biases and thoughts about things. However, today I learned a lesson in humility - listen first. I should have done that. Had I, I am pretty sure I could have avoided misperceptions and a measure of conflict.

in the wake of this valuable conversation I think I have at least two really great things that are  good news.

The first thing that is good news is that I think I made a friend and ally. 

The second piece of good news? Together we created tension. That's right, tension. There were moments in the conversation where it was quite palpable. However, better than a problem to be solved, this tension is the sort of thing that makes me grow, pushes me, stretches my thoughts and perspective - and in that way is a really good thing. 

Perhaps this is one of the greatest learnings of all from my morning coffee with my new friend. When I was driving to this conversation I had today it felt like there would be a problem to be solved. However, after listening, I think that had we "solved" it (ie made all the tension go away by either refusing to talk more or simply affirming one another's biases) we might have lost something important. Instead, we walked away as two people who share a lot of common convictions - but who hold these things in different ways and as a result there is a bit of tension. However, I don't want to solve it by getting rid of it. Instead, I am glad - even grateful for it. It's this very tension that is going to make me have to grow, learn and be challenged. 

This leads to, perhaps the best part of the morning for me: I think that because we both are trying to be followers of Jesus and invite others to discover the miracle of a life with Jesus Christ - we discovered that greater than our tension is the goodness of being part of what the Bible calls the "body of Christ." The fact is that we did and likely will disagree - but for a moment or two this morning I think that we realized that greater than our disagreements is the unity that we can have as fellow Christ followers. 

I got bit in the . . . . .

Sometimes being a pastor is a bite in the butt! (yep, I went there)

I am not saying the job is bad. I am not trying to elicit any sympathy. And, I am not trying to make it seem more special or difficult than any other job. But, I am going to say that the practicing what you preach truism can really be a hard pill to swallow, especially for those who actually do preach for a living.

Case in point: I spoke last sunday about truth. Not truth in a philosophical sense where I would have to wade into issues of ontology and epistemology. These are good and right discussions - just not up for grabs on that Sunday. Instead, I was leaning more into the fact that we need truth as a community, need to speak and hear truth from others if we are going to be challenged to grow, and, finally landed on the incredible promise that Jesus makes about knowing the truth and the truth setting us free. All good, right and biblical.

Two days before I preached a person came into my office, and, over the course of the conversation essentially said (and here I know them and believe them to be trustworthy and lovingly motivated) that they thought I was fat. 

Truth. Loving. Gotta say that in the moment, the "set free" part was a bit hard to take in.

Then, yesterday, in the wake of speaking about truth someone else, unrelated, emailed me to tell me that they thought that "my waistline wasn't getting any smaller."

Truth. Again from a loving person. Again, hard to feel really like I was free.

So, a couple of things come out of this whole discourse. First, I think I was naive in my message. Not that it wasn't true and right in a factual sense. Just a bit naive. As one who had been the recipient of some loving truth this past week I have to say, even the most loving truth can sting. I think I will include that if/when I ever speak about this again.

Secondly, about the freedom thing: What if it's the case that the freedom isn't an immediate gift that showers over us in a nearly nirvanna-esque manner in the moment truth is spoken? Instead, what if the truth, at least sometimes, is more like a catalyst towards a measure of growth (or, in this case, hopefully of a growth that really is a shrinking) that will be freeing? Or, what if the truth spoken in love is like a course corrective, setting us on a new direction that will in fact be more freeing a life that we would have had without that truth? Again, I think that this would be different if/ when I speak about it again.

Why say all of this? Well, for the most part I think it's just honest. But, more to the point I think it shows that this life of following Jesus Christ has a lot of dimension - it literally creeps and seeps into every pore of our being if we let it. I also think it's worth mentioning simply because this whole process of following Christ is just that - a process. As such it takes time, effort, LOTs of effort at times, hard work, decisions, discipline, the help of others, etc.

So, here's hoping that day 2 of my resolve to hear and act on the truth that has been spoken to me goes as well as the first. And, who knows, maybe 6-7 months from now I will be able to tell you about what the freedom part feels, smells and looks like!

Redemptive Obstacles

This past Sunday afternoon I was - along with millions of others I am sure - watching the NFL play-offs. In particular, I was watching the Bears/ Packers game - the result of which I liked quite a bit! Go Packers! How can anyone not like Aaron Rogers?!? I digress.

While I was watching, my daughter came in the room. Now, she's not a football fan at all. In fact, as she came and snuggled up next to me under a blanket her only comment was, "Are you still watching football?" Far from feeling the need to justify my football watching, my keen paternal sense was that what she was really saying was, "When are you going to be done with the TV!?!?!" I digress yet again.

After watching a down or two with me she said, "Dad, this is violent!" I agreed. Then she said something that caught me up a bit, "Dad, I don't think I will EVER play any sports." Now she had my attention. 

"Why not?" I asked.

"They are too hard," she said. "I just don't see why people would want to put themselves through that."

Now, two things have come to the fore for me as I thought about that comment. (In the moment I had to let it go cuz, well, I was pre-occupied with watching the game. Poor parenting, sure - I'll give you that.

As I thought about it, two things struck me. First, I would be really sad if my kids didn't play some sort of sports. For me, as I grew up, whether it was baseball, basketball, football, hockey - it didn't really matters. Some of the best things I ever learned I learned from playing on a team. In addition, some of my best friends were friends I made playing on teams. For all of these sorts of reasons, sports of some kind seems almost indispensable for kids.

But, the thing that struck me most was her comment about how hard it looked to her to play a sport. All of that got me thinking about obstacles and how good some of them can be for us. Allow me to explain.

In a podcast I listened to the other day Malcom Gladwell (writer extraordinaire) talked about a book he wrote entitled, "Outliers." It's a great read. But, as he commented on the book he said that the one regret he had about the book is that he didn't spend a lot of time talking/ writing about the power and usefulness of obstacles. His example was about class sizes. He wondered aloud if all the thinking about small class size was really flawed. In particular, he wondered if there isn't a loss to kids if they are always in small classes with individualized attention. What if, in this sort of context they never learn to initiate things themselves, problem solve with others in a group context, etc.? In this setting, the large class size is seen as an obstacle to many - and Gladwell wondered if the removal of this obstacle might result in more problems than it's presence. 

Now, pedagogical arguments aside, the point seemed worth pondering. What I realized is that a lot of my parenting and pastoring revolves around the notion that if I remove enough obstacles my kids will flourish and people will grow in their faith.

What if this isn't the case? 

What if removing the obstacles and making things as easy and accessible as possible is really a hindrance for my kids - even if it feels right in the moment?  is the same true for people searching for faith?

Even more creatively - what would it look like to engineer obstacles for our kids to teach them perseverance. WWould the same apply to faith?

Or, are the cynics right - is it the case that the world and faith matters are so rife with obstacles that no one will ever suffer from a lack of them so make things as easy as we can for now?

Are there redemptive obstacles? The answer clearly seems yes. However, in what ways should this shape parenting? leadership? faith? life?

Eagle's Flight

Eagle's Flight!

The other day I needed a resource - a hard to find, really exceptional resource. It's the sort of thing that you just can't run out to the store and get. I called a friend - he didn't have it. I called another. He had it, but it was unavailable. Then, he said, "But you know, you should call "Eagle's Flight."

Eagle's Flight is a company that specializes in conferences, training, leadership development, etc. I had never heard of them. But, I called.

Can I tell you that they were EXCELLENT! Above and beyond. Exceptional.

Not only did they have the resource - they said I could use it, generously offering it for free for the time that I needed it. 

The "free" part is really nice. But, more than that I have to add that they were helpful, encouraging and listened to a perfect stranger make a request of them.

I don't make a habit of pimping anything/ product etc. But, I have to tell you - in a world were almost everyone is looking for a $ grab, these guys stood out for there helpfulness to be sure - but even more for their character! Well played "Eagle's Flight" - well played indeed.

Chemo

Last week I met with my parents at the Oncologist. My dad has lymphoma. While we were waiting my mom took out some lunch she had brought with her - apples, soup, grapes, etc. I looked at the apples and noticed that one of them was covered with a white-ish film.

"What's with the apple?" I asked my mom.

"I don't know," she said, "I washed them but it wouldn't come off."

"Well, I think that stuff causes cancer," I said. "So, dad, since you already have it, you have to eat that one."

That moment aside, this morning my dad is launching his very own "Good-Ship-Chemotherapy." He was diagnosed with a form of cancer that requires the treatment for the next 6 months. If I think about it rationally I know it's the required course of action, routine, common. And a part of me genuinely feels that way.  I mean, the stats say that we will all know someone who has undergone chemo in treatment of cancer from our family. Why should we be any different?

A book I was reading the other day talked about "postures." It's the author's way of talking about how you approach and live through certain events and parts of life - that you "adopt a certain posture" towards whatever is before you.

I am not sure what the posture is that one should adopt towards chemo. Part of me wants to say - "No big deal, lots of people go through this all the time." Sadly, if the crowds at the cancer clinic are any indicator this is really the case. Part of me also wonders if you are supposed to sound the alarm bell - "Hey, we got a crisis over here!!!" But that doesn't seem right at all.

Dallas Willard says "Do the thing that you know to be right and then expect God to bail you out." I am under no illusion that God's bailing me out equated to my dad being cancer free. But, I wonder what it would look like? So, my resolve is to pray for my dad and mom. That seems right. I'm also going to ask God to heal - he has the power to do it, and maybe that's what he wants to do. And, I think that the right resolve here would also be to simply look to and "fix eyes on" Jesus. Some might accuse me of being simplistic on this one. But, it seems like the right thing to do - in all things, good, bad, challenging and the rest - fixing eyes on, orienting hearts towards and asking for the leadership, care, home and Kingdom of Jesus in my life and that of my family.

Oh, and for the record, even my dad wouldn't eat the apple . . .